kristin has been a bad kristin
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
My ATM looks so different sober.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
