Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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