i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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