ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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