these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
