did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
