Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
