He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
