I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
