in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
