fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
