idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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