I feel like abortions should bother me more
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
My vagina is officially offended.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
