Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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