He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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