if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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