just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize