what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
