no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
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