Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize