Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Mom said you looked used
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
