so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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