Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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