I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Randomize
