Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
People with herpes should wear stickers.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
