I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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