Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
