She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize