new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
