Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I hate all girls vehemently.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
