Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
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