maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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