i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Randomize
