ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
