My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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