Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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