tell your sister to shave her snatch
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
