we have officially lost it.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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