Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize