Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
