She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Randomize
