He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
