she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
do herpes really smell.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
