I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
