so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
