My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
