My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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