Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
