He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
