It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
