Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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